Having been in the field of communications for over a decade both as a consultant and a speaker, I have met many people with varying proficiencies in communications.

What makes me sympathetic towards some of them though is the closed, almost fortified, approach they have towards their conversations, interactions and dealings with people who could potentially be of great value to them and their businesses.

The basic model of communications involves, traditionally, a sender and a receiver. In this, ideally the sender is successful in delivering the message as intended in the most perfect manner and the receiver is able to receive it as intended without their own personal prejudices or internal blocks and barriers altering it before their minds can accurately process the message.

However, as we know, the world is not perfect. We often do not get the benefit of the ideal. Our approaches, preferences, learnings, experiences, business cultural backgrounds, fluency and a whole lot more differ from person to person.

While one may prefer a more direct yet casual approach to opening conversations, some may prefer a more formal and ‘proper’ approach. I mean Warren Buffet loves his suits while Mark Zuckerberg made his billions in t-shirt and jeans.

The trick really is not in how one has sent their message to you or how you prefer to receive it. The primary rule of relationships is to first be interested in every possibility and connection rather than seeking to be impressed.

No one would know what would be of value or meaning to you better than yourself. So take the opportunity to communicate to find meaning, opportunities, possibilities instead of judging how you are being communicated to and in the process building barriers and discounting potential.

Ask the right questions. If what was communicated was not sufficient, be specific in what other details you require. Be open to share what would be of value to you. Help the sender or receiver to help you create your desired meaning.

By doing so you ensure many more fulfilling and rewarding interactions. You do not need to put yourself on a pedestal waiting to be convinced. Place yourself upon a bridge to actively find connecting points.

Dale Carnegie said “You can make more friends in two months by becoming interested in other people than you can in two years by trying to get other people interested in you.”

Take ownership.

By Rahul Shah

Communications Speaker &

Founder of Up Your Game Community